If you know someone whose pet has recently died, you may be at a loss as to how to support them. Your awkwardness may come from disagreeing with their decision to or not to euthanize. You may not understand that grief from losing a pet is different and can be more intense than losing a human loved one. If you are the person who lost a pet, you may not understand why your friends are being so weird. Neither part of the community is trying to cause more pain. We’re all awkwardly navigating the sea of grief. 

Some people want to add a new pet soon after their beloved pet’s passing. That is part of their healing process, and that is OK. Others may wait longer or choose not to add a new furry family member ever again. This is also OK.  

The roller coaster of grief may have your friend rejecting the notion of a new pet Monday, only to start feverishly searching the web for pets Tuesday. For the time being, it’s best not to send/tag your friend in photos of adoptable pets. Pictures of kittens, puppies, and adorable adult pets give us an oxytocin boost. Even though the pictures are meant to brighten your friend’s day, it may not be received that way. 

Perhaps the best way to support your friend on the lonely side of the rainbow bridge is to check in on them often. Reach out to your friend and ask about their day. Listen to their stories about their pet and share your favorite memories of their pet. Pets bring us together. May their memories buoy us out of the sea of grief, away from awkwardness, and towards a more peaceful place.