Are You in the No?

I’ve been asked (usually by compulsion based trainers) if I have ever said “no” to my dog. Yes, I have panicked and yelled “no” when my dog is about to do something dangerous like eat a poisoned dead mouse or run into traffic. Because me yelling “no” is out of character, my dog is startled and stops what she’s doing. This buys me time to give her better cues and correct my mistakes. 

I’ve also been asked if it’s OK to say “no” to a dog. I usually respond by asking how many times they find themselves saying “no” to their dog. If you find yourself saying “no” to your dog a lot, you need to figure out a way to say “yes” more. 

Here’s the thing about “no”: It’s a word, just like all others, that dogs do not inherently understand. It’s the “no” tone that your dog is responding to, not necessarily the word itself. Not to mention that it doesn’t teach your dog what you prefer her to do. Sure, it may stop her in the moment, but without further instructions, she's very likely to resume doing whatever the behavior was that you didn’t like. It’s a cycle that leads to exasperation. “No” is not a replacement behavior for barking, nipping, biting, shredding, potty accidents, pulling on leash, or jumping up on people. Saying "yes" to being quiet, settled, occupying themselves with a puzzle or toy, pottying outside, walking nicely on leash, and sitting are the replacement behaviors. 

So yeah, say "no" when it's life or death. Otherwise, find a way to say "yes" more.